Children's Song

Blah, blah, black sheep, have you any wool?

Pirate knifes

Dad! Did you know this? Pirate knifes are really knives for Pirates!

Home Sweet Home

Why is Virginia so beautiful?

Facts of Life

Daddy, my computer stopped working and now I have to start my email all over again!

Squirrels Eat Acorns

Squirrels eat walnuts, too, and coconuts!

Coconuts

Walnuts turn into coconuts.

Computer Lessons

C: The cats teached me.
Dad: What did they teach you?
C: How to use a computer.

The Moon

See? The moon is made of cheese! A piece just fell in my mouth. It's cheddar!

Lego Building

C: I can build it however I want.
Dad: You're right. I don't want to squash your creative spirit.
C: Dad, you squashed my creative spearmint.

Mom's Morning Breath

Mom, your breath smells like potatoes.

When I Eat Food

It all tastes the same, except for things I don't like.

When I Grow Up

I want to be a policeman.

The Golden Rule

Do the things that you really want other people to do.

Waiting for minor bump-removal surgery

Mom: Do you have any questions?
C, excited: Yes! Are they going to take out my eyeballs?

Comets

When a comet hits the Earth, it's called the golf of America.