tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3183645239013418622024-03-13T09:13:20.052-07:00CalvinismsAgr snaphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02922655949919491957noreply@blogger.comBlogger214125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-36746899380230589062012-05-24T18:15:00.002-07:002012-05-24T18:17:43.741-07:00SweetsHugging is the best part of life...<br />
<br />
...but candy is too.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-46686907344228251202011-08-23T15:10:00.000-07:002011-08-23T15:12:03.764-07:00Disaster<div class="iblogger-post">Remember the earthquake in Japan? It was so major. First there was an earthquake, then a salami. </div><div class="iblogger-footer"><p>[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-45944211612787495872011-07-04T19:34:00.000-07:002011-07-04T19:36:49.210-07:00False Advertising<div class="iblogger-post">Happy Meals never make me happy. </div><div class="iblogger-footer"><p>[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-13693211567316613192011-06-23T04:54:00.000-07:002011-06-23T04:56:42.648-07:00Epicure<div class="iblogger-post">Dad: We have something for your bag lunch today - a spring roll!<br/>Calvin: <surprised look> do you have duck sauce?<br/></div><div class="iblogger-footer"><p>[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-48718742981276782812011-05-15T07:24:00.000-07:002011-05-15T07:25:07.617-07:00Funny<div class="iblogger-post">Stop! Stop! Stop! That's hilarious but stop!</div><div class="iblogger-footer"><p>[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-60517511906922006002011-04-24T14:12:00.000-07:002011-04-24T14:14:15.908-07:00Monty Python and the Holy Grail<div class="iblogger-post">C: How smart are the French?<br/>Dad: Just as smart as everybody else.<br/>C: In that movie they didn't seem very smart.</div><div class="iblogger-footer"><p>[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-49284492067472556622011-03-03T10:07:00.000-08:002011-03-03T15:08:30.616-08:00Sign of future cannibalism?(while poking own face) "what is the human meat called?"<div class="iblogger-footer"><br clear="all"/><p style="text-align:right;font-size:10px;">[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p><br/></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-9907025433119163142011-01-30T09:33:00.000-08:002011-01-30T14:34:29.307-08:00New house ruleMustaches do not go on the wall. <br/><br/>- Mom<div class="iblogger-footer"><br clear="all"/><p style="text-align:right;font-size:10px;">[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p><br/></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-52475023554550683312010-12-30T06:30:00.000-08:002010-12-30T06:30:00.948-08:00Tubes!Cole said he'd break our internets. <br />Agr snaphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02922655949919491957noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-41498787787527774752010-12-12T06:27:00.000-08:002010-12-12T11:29:44.961-08:00Unverifiable HypothesisIf you sliced people up like paper, there would be so many pieces you wouldn't even be able to count them all in the same day. <div class="iblogger-footer"><br clear="all"/><p style="text-align:right;font-size:10px;">[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p><br/></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-61656228219899065182010-11-29T14:51:00.000-08:002010-11-29T19:53:25.575-08:00Proposal for the City of HarrisonburgPolicemen should get free slingshots so they can shoot robbers getting away in balloons. <div class="iblogger-footer"><br clear="all"/><p style="text-align:right;font-size:10px;">[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p><br/></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-27057073346800888602010-10-09T09:10:00.000-07:002010-10-09T13:11:43.951-07:00Discovering International TradeWhy is everything I have made in China?<div class="iblogger-footer"><br clear="all"/><p style="text-align:right;font-size:10px;">[Posted with <a href="http://illuminex.com/iBlogger/index.html">iBlogger</a> from my iPhone]</p><br/></div><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-74759546634233766282010-09-11T19:20:00.000-07:002010-09-11T19:21:09.148-07:00The origin of ManC: Where do cats come from?<br />Mom: Other cats.<br />C: But where did the first cat come from?<br />Mom: Good question! Where did the first person come from?<br />C: From a fairy who put two people on the Earth, and those people made all the other people.<br />Mom: Some people think so, but they call the fairy God. Other people think we came from monkeys.<br />C: No, from apes. First they were apes, then Indians, and then people.<br />Mom: No, Indians are people. I think you mean Indians were the first people who lived here.<br />C: The first people to live in houses? No, they didn't live in houses, they lived in pyramids!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-35719421250656665282010-09-05T09:35:00.000-07:002010-09-05T09:37:43.169-07:008 millionMom: What is 4 million plus 4 million?<br />Calvin: 8 million! Mom, you messed my HEAD up with MATH!mathgrrlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17236326897530195255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-36654183325275363452010-08-09T13:05:00.000-07:002010-08-09T17:07:14.963-07:00Black on blackIf you draw black marker over black crayon, it GLOWS IN THE DARK.<br />Agr snaphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02922655949919491957noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-74721742149991166912010-08-09T13:04:00.000-07:002010-08-09T17:05:40.912-07:00Person cakesZombies eat person-flesh cakes!<br />Agr snaphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02922655949919491957noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-50626264186713723482010-07-24T03:28:00.000-07:002010-07-24T07:31:14.307-07:00Teaching Oleana ScienceThere are little things you can't see, and they're called germs and they make you dirty. Everyday they make you dirty. <br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-34138498304814562712010-07-05T04:47:00.000-07:002010-07-05T08:49:18.511-07:00???Mom: Name an animal that begins with "D". <br/>C: a duckladder!<br/>Mom: What's a duckladder?<br/>C: It's an animal that climbs up trees even though it's a duck. <br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-47531097545858440962010-05-22T04:36:00.000-07:002010-05-22T08:38:35.928-07:00Bad Ship LollipopC: I have pirates on my belt!<br/>Mom: Those aren't pirates, those are skulls and crossbones. <br/>C: No, they're called Jolly Ranchers. <br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-6846282152030591292010-05-22T04:32:00.000-07:002010-05-22T08:36:06.044-07:00PhonicsDad: What letter does "xylophone" start with?<br/>C: Z!<br/>Dad: Actually, it's X. <br/>C: X?! That's crazy! That would be an "X-lophone"!<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-7806291232463810742010-05-16T13:10:00.000-07:002010-05-16T17:11:36.846-07:00AuthorityCole believes everything I say. He's right. <br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-35702659739424010742010-05-16T13:09:00.000-07:002010-05-16T17:10:06.740-07:00More ButterfliesI'm a real butterfly scientist!<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-91554164455050857302010-05-16T13:05:00.000-07:002010-05-17T06:46:38.580-07:00A ButterflyHis legs are leaving hearts and hearts on my arm.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-44363527725316903672010-05-16T10:41:00.000-07:002010-05-17T06:26:26.485-07:00Self-satisfactionMommy, if I were you, I wouldn't want to be you. I would want to be me. <br /><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318364523901341862.post-90183505978536300322010-04-27T16:21:00.001-07:002010-04-27T19:29:20.031-07:00ScoobyScooby-Doo is his real name, Scooby-Doo-Be-Doo is his long name.mathgrrlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17236326897530195255noreply@blogger.com0